Kundali Matching as Chemistry
After writing a couple of articles on Kundli matching and pouring out all the information I have, from very basic to some advanced aspects of matchmaking. This is what I understood. Not everyone who reads me understands Vedic astrology as I do. If I write it from an astrologer's point of view some will understand my core point and many will still wander for themselves, "is their kundli match okay to go for marriage?".
Therefore I decided to write about Kundali matching as if I'm explaining a 15-year-old.
As below...
Kundli matching explains the outcomes of two people forming a bond or a relationship.
Understand the concept this way, a Kundli match can be related to a chemical bond between two atoms in a molecule. Just as a molecule is a bond between two atoms, a Kundli match is a bond between two people.
Extending it further, In the same way, as there are different types of molecular bonds, there are different types of relationship bonds. Some molecules are strong, while others are weak and every molecule has different properties and characteristics. This is even same with relationships, some are very strong to their core levels while some are weak and different relationship exhibits different properties.
You as a person is an atom of a relationship. So it is very natural that with some people it will be very easy for you to form a relationship and with some other type of people, it will be a bit difficult or might require some special conditions for your bond to survive in a long run. This is the same as some atoms like hydrogen and oxygen form a strong bond called H2O or water that we drink. While it can be hard for the same atoms to form a good bond with other kinds of an atom.
If you have understood so far what I have explained. It will be much easier for to you grasp the simple tricks I'm about to share on matching kundli and successful marriage.
How does Kundali matching work?
If we talk about a bride and a groom in a marriage relationship. At a basic level, both of them are different people - in nature, in emotions, in interests, in thinking style, in basic behaviour and also in sexual appetite.
When two people with (if not the same but) a complementary and accommodating nature come together. There are very high chances that both of them might form a good friendship and ultimately a good relationship.
When two individuals with traits that are repulsive to each other come together there is a high chance that a bond formed between them will be fundamentally not so strong.
Just as NaCl (common salt) is broken apart when dissolved in water even under normal conditions. While water (H2O) never breaks that way.
This is the same way how Kundli Matching works. Smartness here is to find a marriage partner with whom there are higher chances for you to develop a strong bond and good foundations of marriage.
What to see in Kundali Matching?
Kundali Matching is a composite of many marriage compatibility factors which have their purpose in marriage-matching. Therefore it is advised to see Kundali matching as a whole with your total Guna Milan score.
Even though it is not in our hands, but still let us try to discuss.
Finding The Right Partner Through Kundli Matching
There are certain things that one should keep in mind before starting any search process. These include:-
- Your own personality and temperament. - (Mental compatibility)
- What do you want from life? What do you want from your partner? Are you looking for someone who shares similar values and beliefs? Or if no, then how would like them to fit into your life? How would you fit in their life? - (Marital life and Blissful Marriage)
- How compatible are you with this particular individual? Is he/she suitable for you? (Overall Guna Milan)
- Do they match well enough to make a lasting union possible? (Kundli Milan)
Therefore what an individual might seek in Kundli matching and Guna Milan might slightly differ from person to person.
For a good horoscope match, it is ideally advised by astrologers that a couple should score at least 18 points in Kundli matchmaking. But we advised to set the bar a little high and, if possible, a bride and groom should go for more than 20 points in Guna Milan.
Now lets us discuss what should you prioritise in a Kundali match as per your wants:
1. Mental Compatibility
The mental compatibility of a couple is very important. If you are not compatible with your partner in the mental aspect of the relationship, then it will be difficult for the two of you to live together happily and peacefully. You should try to understand each other's needs and desires so that you can make things work out between the both of you. It would also help if you have similar interests in life. This way, you could enjoy spending time together without any problems or disagreements.
In mental compatibility, it is all about our behaviours, temperaments and needs and desires from a life partner. If they well align it helps so much in mutual agreement between a couple many times.
So if you are seeking Mental harmony and behaviours which compliments each other then you look at Gana matching, Varna matching, Vashya matching and Tara matching.
There should be no major dosha like Gana dosha. And the total of all these five areas of marriage-matching should not score less than 50% of the allotted points. An actively present Mangal dosha difference between bride and groom can also have a huge impact on the mental compatibility between a couple.
2. Sexual Compatibility and Progeny
If we talk about sexual compatibility it is one of the most important things between married couples during the initial days of marriage when bride and groom are young.
The first step in the process of a sexual relationship is to find a suitable partner. The most important factor for this purpose is physical attractiveness, but it does not mean that only physically attractive people can have successful marriages or relationships. You must look for subject attractiveness at the physical and sexual levels. What I mean by subjective attractiveness is that the same person might be attractive to you but no attractive to your friend. But this is something you might only know after getting close to any person. Here Yoni matching might help the bride and groom. Sexual compatibility is when a couple enjoys the intimate closeness and satisfaction level is good after the conjugal action.
Yoni matching is a part of horoscope matching which specially deals with the conjugal happiness of a couple. Sexual chemistry in married life is not only about the initial spark of the relationship. You can have that initial spark even with the person who is not a long term go with you. Sexual chemistry is also about how the bride and groom enjoy the act of sex and intimacy over time in the sexually active span of marriage.
Yoni matching score is very important here. A couple should at least have 2 points out of the total 4 points allotted to yoni matching in Guna Milan. In yoni compatibility, 2 or 2+ points signifies the marital life sukha like bed pleasures and happy sexual love life.
Another extended but very important area in marriage compatibility is progeny and children. In Ashtakoot Guna Milan, the capacity of a couple for healthy progeny is judged by Nakshatra Nadi and Nadi matching.
The Nadi compatibility between a man and woman is the most important factor in determining whether they will be able to have children, but I should say it is not limited to it. Many other factors can affect fertility as well. For example:
Age and Health - If both partners are older the chances of having kids decreases. Both men and women need to maintain their health if they want to conceive.
Health conditions and Weight - If both the bride and groom are overweight, this may also impact how long it takes for them to have a child.
Stress - Stress is one of the important factor causes decreased fertility in both or any one of the marriage partner.
In addition to these external factors, there might be some internal causes of infertility too.
3. Friendship between a couple and Emotional Compatibility
Friendship plays an important role in every aspect of our lives. It helps us understand each other better and makes us feel more comfortable with each other. Friendships play an important role in making marriages work. They provide emotional support during times of stress and give strength to overcome problems together. When we get along with someone well, we tend to trust him/her wholeheartedly. This kind of friendship gives confidence to couples and strengthens the love life and marriage as well.
I think the friendship between marriage partners is underrated but the most important thing to a relationship. Love life apart from romance is all about enjoying each other company and companionship.
For a successful marriage in this area of relationship, the Graha Maitri and Bhakoot matching are the most important factors to look at in Kundali matching.
Good points scored in Graha Maitri, Bhakoot matching and Tara matching gives very high chances for a couple to develop a good friendship.
Does the happiness of Married life depend on Kundali Matching?
YES, but only to some extent. In Vedic astrology, marriage compatibility is one thing and happiness that comes from love life or married life is another thing. Let me tell you why. Irrespective of matching kundali, when trying to figure out if a person will be happy from his marriage or not. We will end up looking at the horoscope or kundli of that particular person for the matter of his/her happiness from the marriage.
I have always said in my many articles that happiness is subjective, and is independent of your choice of marriage partner. But still, a type of Kundali match can greatly influence the subject of marital life bliss.
It is my observation that a person who is destined to have very good fruits of married life ends up marrying a good match life partner.
While a person who is destined for an average married life will end up marrying some with whom they might have an average Kundali match.
To check this destined fortune in marriage astrology. You can check about the signification of your married life in your horoscope.
Is Kundali Matching necessary?
Kundali matching is being a part of the Hindu marriage matching process and it is an important decision making factor about the marriage decisions. If some ask that if Kundli matching is necessary, ideally there is no answer to it. Since Kundali matching cannot guarantee a happy married life as happiness is much more dependant on the subject's horoscope than on the Kundali matching process.
All I would say is, though not necessary, if you have a chance to match Kundli before marriage it will be a wise choice to do it. As there is no harm in kundli matching itself. Plus Kundali matching, if used effectively, can help you understand your relationship better during and before the course of married life.
